I’ve been seeing this more and more in comments, and it’s got me wondering just how big this issue really is. A lot of people feel trapped in apps like Discord, WhatsApp, and Instagram, but can’t get their friends to leave.

It’s really annoying when you suggest trying something new, whether it’s a different app or just not using these platforms so much but sometimes it can feel like no one wants to go first.

So I’m curious, what apps do you feel most trapped in? And have you tried convincing your friends to leave them? What happened? Is it an issue for you, or are you just going along with the flow?

Looking forward to hearing if this is as common as it feels!

  • njm1314@lemmy.world
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    3 hours ago

    I just cannot fathom how people use discord to communicate. Maybe if it’s a very small group like ten people tops. But anything bigger? Seems like chaos.

  • SupremeDonut@lemmy.ml
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    6 hours ago

    People don’t typically like change. It has to feel like it’s their decision to drive them there.

  • duckworthy@sh.itjust.works
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    6 hours ago

    People can’t be convinced of anything, it’s a losing battle to try. The only way to get people to change is to live a certain way and if people admire it, then they ask you about it and you share.

    So for example-I’m a minimalist and I really wished my sister would declutter because her place is overcrowded. But instead of trying to convince her, I just shared what my life normally was like. Eventually she asked me for help decluttering, and she felt a lot better about what I helped with. Now we share cleaning and organization tips.

    For me, I just put in my insta bio I left for Pixelfed and to come friend me there.

    I’ve told my friends I’m off insta because I’d rather be on a platform where I control my feed that’s ad free. And that I rarely see my friends content on insta so it doesn’t matter that much to me to have friends on there. If they get interested, great if not, I’m still happy.

  • Lettuce eat lettuce@lemmy.ml
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    5 hours ago

    Discord for me. A bunch of my family and friends are avid gamers. Discord is the universal standard app they all use for general communication.

    Not only do they use it for all their gaming related stuff, they have additional servers and channels for just chilling, chatting, off topic stuff, memes, politics, etc etc.

    It’s the network effect. Even if there was an open source app that perfectly replicated all the functionality of Discord and was just as simple to install and run as Discord, most of them still wouldn’t switch to it, because all of their friends and family are still on Discord.

    So they would have to have two completely separate apps with totally separate social groups to maintain, and nobody but hardcore advocates for FOSS and privacy are willing to do that.

    Sure, I have Discord, Matrix, IRC, Signal, XMPP clients, and a Private Mumble server, all on my systems, but I’m hardcore about FOSS. None of my friends and family are willing to do that. It took all my energy to convince two of my most techie friends just to get Signal on their phones. And only One has been willing to install a Matrix client to chat just with me.

  • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    6 hours ago

    I tried to get friends to use Signal. It’s hard because it’s a new app they e never used. One flat out refuses to use anything other than SMS and one messaging app to avoid bloat, and the others it’s just hard to get buy in when you’re the only person they know using it.

  • Paddy66@lemmy.ml
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    8 hours ago

    Threaten them with having to communicate with you using email - they’ll install Signal 😂

  • Catalyst_A@lemmygrad.ml
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    7 hours ago

    I have a anonymous IG to keep up with activist events. The dumb asses post their actions on Meta FIRST!!! I’ve already deleted or am in the process of deleting all META accounts and even though I use the Aluicord version of discord, it still has trackers. I never use discord. I enjoy Cleotri more. But I just straight up told people I’d be deleting them altogether. If they won’t move off then they can hang themselves without me.

  • spectraxil@lemmy.ml
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    12 hours ago

    It’s because our marketing sucks. People don’t care about their privacy, they like what is cool. So what does that mean? It mean we gotta make using open source app so cool that people can’t help but join because all the cool kids are here. You feel me? Preaching alone is not enough although it will benefit all of us

  • Nightsoul@lemmy.world
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    8 hours ago

    Because lot of people just either don’t care, are too lazy to switch, or the vast majority of their friends and family still use the apps.

    In addition, they may feel like they are losing out on something, especially for Instagram where a large portion of the population uses regularly.

  • msherburn33@lemmy.ml
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    8 hours ago

    The crux is that all the alternatives suck. I don’t have a problem going App hopping, I just have a very hard time finding ones that don’t fundamentally suck, and I am not talking about little implementation issue, but garbage like Signal that violates the GDPR, wants your phone number and is proud of it. Always grinds my gears when that gets celebrated as the “alternative”. Same with the Fediverse, where user owns nothing and server operator controls everything, how again is that different from Reddit, Facebook and Co.?

    Nostr and Tox seem ok so far, but really the amount of true alternatives that improve on the original in significant ways is pretty damn rare.

  • Broken@lemmy.ml
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    14 hours ago

    SMS

    Nobody wants to use a messaging app at all. At this point I’d rather be stuck on WhatsApp. But its all family. Big family and try to get them to agree on anything is like pulling teeth.

    I even sent everybody a “contact card” I made with my links to signal, simplex, and even whatsapp (figuring that’s the path of least resistance) saying I’d prefer to communicate on any of those apps. ZERO people changed nor did they even ask about it, options, or my reasoning.

    • BlueberryWalnut@sopuli.xyz
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      10 hours ago

      I did a similar contact card thing for (real) people I cared about from Discord. 2 people installed signal to keep up. 20+ invites went out before I nuked they account. One person already had signal. The other one that installed it now ghosts all my signal comms attempts.

  • manuallybreathing@lemmy.ml
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    15 hours ago

    I ditched meta platforms entirely for signal in 2019, lets say I dont have many close friends anymore haha, my social life is kaput, even my work groupchat is on facebook

  • Vegafjord eo@lemmy.ml
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    9 hours ago

    I think the way we are trying to make technology sound sophisticated and our refusal to reinvent language makes technology become much less accessible than what they should be.

  • mrdown@lemmy.world
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    16 hours ago

    Probably the idea of “all my other friends are on the mainstream platform so why would i move to another platform specifically for you?”

  • ☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmy.ml
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    15 hours ago

    It’s network effects. People have other friends on the network who have their own friends on the network, and so on. Leaving the network means convincing a critical mass of your network to leave along with you.

    • twice_hatch@midwest.social
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      9 hours ago

      And it would be easier with good bridges, but of course the big platforms like Twitter, Facebook, etc., refuse to bridge in or out with anything.

      You can scrape public Facebook feeds, using paid services, but AFAICT you need a friend on the inside to publish your stuff into Facebook.

      I guess that’s one reason I shouldn’t complain about Bluesky - They support Bridgy.