CRIME Drone “narco sub” — equipped with Starlink antenna — seized for the first time in the Caribbean
Updated on: July 3, 2025 / 6:29 AM EDT / CBS/AFP
The Colombian navy on Wednesday announced its first seizure of an unmanned “narco sub” equipped with a Starlink antenna off its Caribbean coast.
The semisubmersible vessel was not carrying drugs, but the Colombian navy and Western security sources based in the region told AFP they believed it was a trial run by a cocaine trafficking cartel.
“It was being tested and was empty,” a naval spokeswoman confirmed to AFP.
Manned semi-submersibles built in clandestine jungle shipyards have been used for decades to ferry cocaine north from Colombia, the world’s biggest cocaine producer, to Central America or Mexico.
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I mean, did Starlink allow it? They got caught.
Starlink is a gaint ass constellation, that spies on us all anyways. Phone calls, Internet, Etc. They let countries at war use to to remotely control drones and more. Most companies just pay fines. They do not care.
Well I hope it’s the only time, because catching it for the second time would be silly. They don’t do catch and release do they?
Some are actually put on display like a trophy by the police or military group that captured it.
Not entirely sure what the policy is for these sorts of things, but I do know various countries Coast Guards and Navies will use abandoned boats, lifeboats, etc. for target practice. It actually serves a couple of purposes, including live fire training. It also ensures the boat will sink, which means other boats won’t spot it, call it in, and cause an unnecessary search & rescue operation all over again for the same vessel. It’s also far safer for the crews to just sink it than it is to tow it. And if they’re busy towing one of these in then it means hours or even days where they can’t be out patrolling and responding to emergencies, etc.
Having said all that I could see them wanting to keep a sub like this since it’s demonstrating a new tactic. Investigators might want to take a close look at how it’s put together. If it wasn’t for that then I could see them just scuttling it after they recovered any drugs (not that there were any in this case).
Right, “it was empty” someone is getting high tonight.
Also this legitimates the tech. Just like porn and VHS, the drug cartels endorse stardink.
Also this legitimates the tech. Just like porn and VHS, the drug cartels endorse stardink.
“Hi there! I’m José Perez. Between 2025 and 2032, I ran over two thousand tons of cocaine into the United States. And when I needed reliable, high speed Internet access to safeguard my very valuable cargo, I knew that I couldn’t settle for the second-best. I used Starlink™. Only Starlink™ gave me the peace of mind that my critical business operations would remain robust in the face of unexpected difficulties, be they hurricanes or US Coast Guard cutters. In today’s fast-paced, competitive business world, whether you need a reliable video stream to a conference room in one of your branch offices or to a night-vision piloting camera on a semi-submersible smuggling platform, you can count on Starlink™!”
Narration speed set: 2.5
“All guarantees are governed by the Starlink^TM Terms and Conditions available at starlink.org/terms. Starlink^TM reserves the right to change these terms at any time for any reason. Starlink^TM reserves the right to provide notice of changes. Starlink^TM reserves the right to change terms for individual customers based on Bullish Statistics. Starlink^TM reserves the right to sniff and decrypt 100% of your traffic to feed to our Starlink^TM Artificial Super Sexy Sniffing High Intensity TalkModel (ASS-SHIT). Viewing of this commercial in its entirety constitutes legal agreement to our Starlink^TM Terms and Conditions.”
A RoboCop ad.
You need to design a dystopian near-future tabletop RPG of some kind.
Every time you try to use an augment, you have to roll for whether the company stopped supporting the product and bricked it.
That whole article was wild. Worth the read.
