take the blue pill, self-destruct: sign back up for facebook, make a tiktok account. Always carry the newest iphone and a stock android phone on your person. Post live photos on instagram of where you are and what you are doing multiple times a day. Sign up for X. Buy a blue checkmark. Live-tweet your fight against constipation. You have nothing to hide if everyone already knows everything about you.

They don’t wanna give you actual numbers. That might be useful. eww…